Hii
The unsual void in my marriage of 11 yrs suddenly became a deep valley and I was left finding answers to questions unknown.Coming to think of it ....DIVORCE was the last thing on my mind then.
Soon thereafter came the festival of lights --- Diwali! My excitement for the festive season had died a natural death in the backdrop of circumstances I was braving through.Putting on a happy facade I was going through the preparations for the sake of my kid and extended family.During one of the days some small issue cropped up and this man got violent !! I was held tight by the arm and driven by the neck through the wall for not collecting his alteration clothes in time ( seems trivial issue but was blown out of proportion back then ). All this happened in front of my stupified daughter and equally astonished 24x 7 house help at home . I feel dejected , but pulled on for the sake of the family festival fervour.. nights spent crying over my misfortune.Somehow managed to put up a gr8 show in front of in laws---too.
November dawned and I felt hopeful since our anniversary was drawing close. My hopes were thrashed when I received not even a wish on the special day for the person whom I loved much. All through journey to work could only muster a hushed thank you for wishes pouring in from family and friends, intercepted by voice choked by tears.I tried to med frneces by suggesting we do the ceremonial dinner as every year but was met with muted responses from the other end. I was drawing close to frustration as every effort of mine met with no plausible success ever. The issue had come to a dead end .
New year dawned and with it lit some hope of making things better ( we celebrated new year eve seperately with our own bunch of friends ,with an intent that things may get better with time ).Mid month out of nothing we had a straight conversation after long. He felt we were drawing apart, which agreed we were...and suggested the " D " word . I was shattered with the ease with which he had said it since were becoming more and more incompatible with each other .We promised to meet up at his office over the weekend to discuss modalities ...love had died down long and only thing left were the price points -- the ecodynamics of love .
In the interim had confided in a friend about the happenings and was feeling better equipped to handle the situation nevertheless, my mental preparation was done for sure .Sunday evening after my things at home I proceeded to meet him at pre-decided time.I didnt know what was in store for me and what was...shook me up totally.
This man handed over an excel sheet to me which totalled upto few lacs he said he owed me to walk out of the relationship.With the inflation and my monies that were used in the house were totalled up and added with annual interest cost ?????????? The numbers left me aghast and I barely managed to hold my calm. What about the kid, I thundered mustering all courage I could.He coolly replied either of us can keep the kid ... as if she was a object to be traded. The moment I felt like hundred daggers crossing my heart.How can a father be so ruthless about his only child ?I walked out in a huff promising a fitting reply to the piece of paper called LOVE.It had been auctioned for few lacs of rupees. I really wanted to ask what about my emotional investment in the relationship of years, how would he pay me back for that ? I felt like an emotional fool trying to salvage what had already been undone.
Once home ,my resolve to walk out of this impending and loveless marriage only became stronger and within a week I announced my decision to part ways legally...The piece of paper did break the ice..
Our folks needed to know the bitter truth now ... Its time they did ....What provoked me for this sudden change of heart ???? wait to know more in my next post.
Tc
Luv
Neha
The unsual void in my marriage of 11 yrs suddenly became a deep valley and I was left finding answers to questions unknown.Coming to think of it ....DIVORCE was the last thing on my mind then.
Soon thereafter came the festival of lights --- Diwali! My excitement for the festive season had died a natural death in the backdrop of circumstances I was braving through.Putting on a happy facade I was going through the preparations for the sake of my kid and extended family.During one of the days some small issue cropped up and this man got violent !! I was held tight by the arm and driven by the neck through the wall for not collecting his alteration clothes in time ( seems trivial issue but was blown out of proportion back then ). All this happened in front of my stupified daughter and equally astonished 24x 7 house help at home . I feel dejected , but pulled on for the sake of the family festival fervour.. nights spent crying over my misfortune.Somehow managed to put up a gr8 show in front of in laws---too.
November dawned and I felt hopeful since our anniversary was drawing close. My hopes were thrashed when I received not even a wish on the special day for the person whom I loved much. All through journey to work could only muster a hushed thank you for wishes pouring in from family and friends, intercepted by voice choked by tears.I tried to med frneces by suggesting we do the ceremonial dinner as every year but was met with muted responses from the other end. I was drawing close to frustration as every effort of mine met with no plausible success ever. The issue had come to a dead end .
New year dawned and with it lit some hope of making things better ( we celebrated new year eve seperately with our own bunch of friends ,with an intent that things may get better with time ).Mid month out of nothing we had a straight conversation after long. He felt we were drawing apart, which agreed we were...and suggested the " D " word . I was shattered with the ease with which he had said it since were becoming more and more incompatible with each other .We promised to meet up at his office over the weekend to discuss modalities ...love had died down long and only thing left were the price points -- the ecodynamics of love .
In the interim had confided in a friend about the happenings and was feeling better equipped to handle the situation nevertheless, my mental preparation was done for sure .Sunday evening after my things at home I proceeded to meet him at pre-decided time.I didnt know what was in store for me and what was...shook me up totally.
This man handed over an excel sheet to me which totalled upto few lacs he said he owed me to walk out of the relationship.With the inflation and my monies that were used in the house were totalled up and added with annual interest cost ?????????? The numbers left me aghast and I barely managed to hold my calm. What about the kid, I thundered mustering all courage I could.He coolly replied either of us can keep the kid ... as if she was a object to be traded. The moment I felt like hundred daggers crossing my heart.How can a father be so ruthless about his only child ?I walked out in a huff promising a fitting reply to the piece of paper called LOVE.It had been auctioned for few lacs of rupees. I really wanted to ask what about my emotional investment in the relationship of years, how would he pay me back for that ? I felt like an emotional fool trying to salvage what had already been undone.
Once home ,my resolve to walk out of this impending and loveless marriage only became stronger and within a week I announced my decision to part ways legally...The piece of paper did break the ice..
Our folks needed to know the bitter truth now ... Its time they did ....What provoked me for this sudden change of heart ???? wait to know more in my next post.
Tc
Luv
Neha
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